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Letter dated July 4, 1935 Ned Scott to Gladys von Ettinghausen
from the Hassayampa Mountain Club, Prescott, Arizona.



c/o B. Goodwin
Hassayampa Mountain Club
Prescott---Arizona

July 4, 1935



Gladys---my beautiful

Of all the days in which to write---but it has been relatively quiet---and this particular evening I am all alone---everyone else has gone to the movies. I dislike such days for they stand for everything I dislike in human beings---last year I remember so well the complete lack of “Americana” on the family---it was so peaceful in the slow tropics---but we had plenty of “Mexicana” between Sept. 15th and 30th---fifteen days of July 4th and then some---

Spent the last two nights in the Grand Canyon---first time I have been there and I must say I was rather disappointed---especially in the lack of extreme color that I always associated with this gigantic drawing card of our amazing government---and all it lacks to make it a Coney Island second to none are some hot dog stands labelled “By courtesy of the Dept. of the Interior.” And what havoc this damned government is playing with this country---grand new highways where used to be but narrow winding wagon roads that used to be so completely inhuman and such fun to drive. One sees everywhere the sign of the “CCC” and you begin to wonder if Washington has not gone mad. In ten years this country will be so utterly transformed---it's horrible to conceive---you had better come out very soon darling for it will not be this way long! ---I wonder if you would like it---you might find it lonely and bleak---I wonder---it is the only place I have been where I can be alone and not feel lonely---and only yesterday Ellen remarked she could not see why people flocked to Europe to live where there was “all this”---and she has spent most of her life abroad. Oh---I hope so terribly you will be able to come out as soon as the ranch is ready.

I don't know whether I told you that I might go East sometime during the next month---and it is quite possible that I may go without Ellen for there is only reason for one of us going and more reason for me as I want to see my child---I haven't seen her for a year and a half and kids do grow so rapidly around her age—-Do think you would like to go if I waited until you were free---we might meet in Yuma!!---

I am wondering how Cornelia has been---I have not written her since my departure from Holl.---neither have I sent her postcards---I detest P. cards and it is always so difficult to write on them.---Why is it I tell you so much of what I think—and feel?---It must be boring to say the least---And, especially when I realize I have told you so much of myself---and you nothing of yourself---anyway---I have tried to write Cornelia but words are difficult and I do not want to write her anything she must read between the lines---that would be fatal----

And so darling---goodnight---I really don't know why I write you this piece of nonsense---it says little---but so much goes with it---you are so utterly swell---

So much love, dear



Ned

 

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Letter dated June 29, 1935, Ned Scott to Gwladys von Ettinghausen
from the Hassayampa Mountain Club in Prescott, Arizona.



c/o Mrs. Walter Goodwin
Hassayampa Mountain Club
Prescott------Arizona
June 29th, 1935

Gladys Darling---- The trip was not so bad---in fact it was rather delightful---there was quite a wind up in the desert making the otherwise suffocating trip bearable---we arrived at four in the morning---just as the Eastern blue was becoming lighter---such shades of blue---so typical of this country---it was a gorgeous dawn and I was so tired.

My mind is a blank and I feel such a complete let-down all over me---it is strange what happens to me in that melting pot of all that is creative---it is exacting and thrills a certain part of me and the other rebels---and so erutpion after eruption occurs within until only the structure remains. The battle is intriguing however and no doubt my return will be in order sometime soon---who knows---

My darling---your sweetness and beauty---the richness of your words---the deep beauty in your eyes---it is all so close---and the sensation is a new one---to me. Doors that have been firmly shut for years are beginning to creak again and I am at a loss to know what to do. There is so much that should have been said before we parted---but I think you know anyway---words so often flatten that which is fully blown and real---I have a job to do now that is one of the most important---the results will only be apparent to me however---afterwards I can be selfish again---.

I hear that we may be able to move into the ranch sooner than expected. Jack is already there and the previous owner is on his way out. It is possible we may move around July 10th. Ellen thinks she will have to go East just to look into some stuff that has been in storage for years---and also she wants her piano sent out which incidentally is a “honey”---to use one of my newly acquired expressions!!! It's about 50 years old---Steinway---size next the concert grand and has a tone never heard in modern pianos. If we should drive East---and you should be free at the moment---how would you like to join us? It is also possible my father's apartment will be empty in which case we would not have to pay hotel bills. It is only a supposition though and there must be countless letters exchanged before we can make up our minds. I would so love to see my child again—altho that is something I must decide---since my erstwhile better half does not think me a suitable papa it might be the wisest course to make up my mind that I shall never see the child again—that is—wisest for the child. I never did tell you the contents of the separation agreement---it is a masterpiece of legal prejudice and I signed it at a time when I would have signed anything to be let loose---I was an awful fool---the strings are so thoroughly tied---and so are my hands---.

But---the world today is very beautiful and I am very happy---and I wonder if you realize it one---one hundreth---the part you have played to make it so. There is a you in all that I love and in all that has substance and perhaps the strangeness of this new world will persist---I want it to but but I am just a little afraid to think---such things have always been so elusive---when clutched at they so easily evaporate---



My love---

Ned

 

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Letter dated Sept. 1, 1935 Ned Scott to Gladys von Ettinghausen
from the Jay Six Cattle Company, Benson, Arizona



Sept. 1, 1935



Gladys Darling---

It is one of those nights---I just couldn't sleep---and so here I am with you again---I am so often with you---you so seldom know it---it is so horribly lonely here---mentally alone---and I am so fed up with this stagnation---petrification---waiting---waiting for what?---and no word from you dear---I was hoping Saturday would bring a letter for Sunday and Labor Day there is no postman---and your sweet letters help so to make this time pass more quickly---it drags so horribly sometimes---Oh, how I wish I were near Landfair Avenue right now---to see you---that last vision still remains so distinct as the last beautiful evening we were together and I so rudely swept out of your comfort---your sweetness---your beauty---But it is the only way to go---when one must---I wonder if such joys and happiness must always be but moments---fleeting moments that remain but memories---to me---yours have been so utterly vivid and red---

On Tuesday Peggy Bok and her managerie make their way East---Henwar leaves the same day for Hollywood---Wednesday I trek down to Benson to hold Ellen's hand and to shoot some pictures for advertising purposes---and incidentally for my board---I have found Jack Spieden quite scotch at times so I feel something must be done while I am there---I have been invited to come and stay indefinitely---you have been invited several times too but I cannot yet tell whether you would like it or not---I wonder---you say you would but you don't know---never having been where one is always in such close contact with the earth---Personally---I don't think I much care for it---bulls are not nearly as fascinating to me as they seem to be to Jack!---and furthermore---Jack is known as quite a ladies man!---would you care to come out?---But seriously---if you could take a vacation why not jump on the train as soon as possible and stay with us till I go back to Hollywood---probably around Oct. 1---it's an idea---one that I would only dare to dream of---but dreams do come true sometimes. You might like it---you know---it's a swell time of year right now---the country is too beautiful---as regards comforts---you might have to sleep on an army cot for awhile---both Ellen's and Jack's furniture is supposed to be on its way from the East. Oh---it would be swell if you but could---Also---it's quite possible that we might have one of the little shacks to ourselves---I don't quite know what the situation is there now---if you are interested darling---I shall enlarge on this as soon as I get back to the ranch---

Hell---I'm all pepped up now---I was so low at the beginning of this stupid letter—-must rush down and mail it now---I feel rather like a drive anyway—-and a terrific storm seems to be brewing above and I love storms—

Do write soon my love---I just cannot bear this isolation---I was not made to be a monk dammit!---

All my love darling


Ned

P.S. Write me to the ranch Jay Six Cattle Company, Benson Arizona---you better come out darling and save me from a life of wrangling---bulls---Jesus!

 

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Letter dated July 4, 1935 Ned Scott to Gladys von Ettinghausen
from the Hassayampa Mountain Club, Prescott, Arizona.



The Jay Six Cattle Company
Jack G. Spieden-President
Bonita, Arizona

August 8, 1935



Gladys Darling---

What a week it has been!---Peggy---Ellen and I arrived about eight days ago only to find ourselves faced with ---what seemed months---of cleaning and painting---etc.---It is so different now---tastes of bygone days have disappeared and in its stead everything is new and clean to look at. But nevertheless it has been most amusing to watch these two---Jack and Ellen---they are both frightened to death of being left alone together---Jack's “Philadelphia”---which he tries so hard to forget---crops out so often---he wants so terribly to be an 'Arizona Cow Man' but he just cannot make the grade. There have been difficult times too---times when Ellen wished she had not done this thing---as irrevocable as it is---times when they both realize what an impossible situation it is---God knows what the outcome will be---Peggy and I were returning to Prescott four days ago but we were prevailed upon to remain by Jack---seems Jack invited a fair maiden of 26 to come and pay him a visit---this was several months ago---she answered that she would just as soon as he had bought a ranch---he received a wire two days ago to the effect she would arrive today by plane from Boston---Jack is now in town to meet her---I'm expecting him any moment---Peggy and I just can't wait to see the developments---if there are any! Peggy predicts that Ellen will be back in Prescott next week!---hope not---Henwar is supposed to be coming out for a few days to visit Babs.---All of which sounds interesting enough from this end but quite boring from yours---sorry---I forgot you know none of the people but Ellen---(--) I plan to leave tomorrow---just as soon as the lady from Boston has been presented in the proper atmosphere! My God, even in this wild country two people can't live in sin---and strangely enough—there is no 'sin' going on! Oh nuts---the idiots----.

Darling---how are you?---and what are you doing?---judging from the inflow of mail from Landfair Ave it is difficult to discover much---!

In my last letter to you dearest---I meant to add that I had run across a certain lady by the name of Blodwynne Meyers---in the Grand Canyon Hotel---and she had with her a very meek looking man she called her husband---. As soon as she mentioned having lived in San Francisco and Seattle I immediately inquired if she knew you and it developed that she knew your whole family and John Considine---thanks God there aren't many Blodwynes in the world!---And incidentally---how the hell does one spell her name?---

Henwar wrote the other day that a certain Publicity Agency had called him up to inquire about me and if I would be interested in a steady job as cameraman---to do commercial with---and publicity. I wrote them that I was interested---of course---held out for $100.---a week---Foolish no doubt---to expect so much on a steady job but if they want me badly enough they can begin work jewing me down---Sure would give anything for a steady job in that town---

I have written Cornelia and sent her telegrams---about Tom---but so far I have had no reply. I'm wondering what's up---do you know anything---and have you seen her recently---?

And so---Good evening Golden Arrow---you are so very close these days---there is so much beauty everywhere when you are as near as you have been recently—my love—if you were only here now to see out this window---the mountains enveloped in purple and red and yellow---splashes of light--- moving---always moving---like you---

Ned

 

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Letter dated September 7, 1935, Ned Scott to Gwladys von Ettinghausen from the J Six Cattle Company, Benson Arizona



It is so late but I feel so awake--fourteen cups of coffee--a slice of bread--and some whole wheat crackers--comprised my feed today--no wonder I feel as I do now--But darling--what a beautifully soft two hours I have just experienced--the moon was bright and everything was quiet and asleep and I just took a walk intending to return to bed almost immediately--instead I found myself still thinking--wondering--after those two grand hours--still atop a knoll--so far far away from this world--and you beside me--you loved it too--and you felt the same things--we were both motionless for hours and hours--but we were so very happy darling--there were no words--they weren't necessary--but there were thoughts--there was a unity----Oh, my love--it is during those moments--so rare here because of all there is to be done--that I love this country--the sky--the stars--the sharp granitic cut of a mountain--a warm moon weaving its way through wisps of very white clouds--now and then a slight stir of coolness--but all is so quiet--so calm--And it is during these moments that I can think--that I know my own mind--that I know what I must do in this world--

My darling--since your last two letters--I have answered them a million times--I have read each at every available interval--and they are from two entirely different people--isn't that strange---Darling, you should not write me when you do not want to--write me when you are dead tired--or during an especially busy hour at the office--if you feel the urge---But never write without that feeling that you must. --I have never taken a good picture unless I had to--to get it out of my system. So, remember!!--And don't you ever dare "--thank you very much"--and this is all supposed to be a bawling out--so take it as such--remembering all the times that--ever your "bread and butter" letter was read over and over again until I know every word by heart!---But----your last one--oh my sweet--so many funny things happened to me as I read--and I always skimp over your letters at first--reading them more carefully immediately afterwards--again & again--But sensations happened that I did not know still could happen inside me--and as I read your last paragraph my whole being went out to you darling--those so precious words could only have emanated from something deeper than the mind--something so very rare and so very big--and you have it--I am go glad you have darling--I love you for it--you are the most beautiful person--And during my recent little visit to another world I thought of all our times together from the very first day--at C's with that Mexican to whom you spoke such exquisite French--I remember so well how strikingly beautiful I thought you as you just sat on the corner of the couch--in black--the chic hat--the graceful way you 'sat' (so few can sit)--I was so conscious of your hands and your voice--and you knew it too--How I wanted to talk to you alone right then but there was not the opportunity--and then the night we went to that dull concert at C's invitation and--how driving back--I thought and thought at such a terrific pace--how could I possibly make a 'date' with you without seeming so eager. I'm a very bad actor indeed--aren't I? But the thrills that went through me when a 'next time' was finally arranged and I knew I could see you again--I was in such horrible depths those weeks before we went out--I could go on and on like this darling--but it would become boring to you I'm afraid--although to me every minute we have spent together is as vivid and precious as the very day it happened--and each time we have been together has not always been so very perfect--mutually so--and at times I have worried--for we both had rather been "through the mill" before--

Just now the approaching drone of a huge plane--from the coast--its green and yellow lights twinkling against the blue background--such a blue too--and with it came just a little more of--you--it has melted into the distance now--How I would love to take it on its return--to be with you in so few hours would be a delightfully exciting thought--and you just must come out here dearest--if you possibly can--although I feel just a little timid in asking you because things are hardly in the shape here I would like them for your comfort--but it would be so very swell to have you close again--there would be little to do darling--but we could go for drives and picnics and I would try so hard not to bore you (but I can't vouch for Jack Spieden!). You must come darling--you must--I can't bear the thought of not seeing you for a whole month--and at that you will be entertaining so much there will not be time for a mere 'me' till October 25th when your mother leaves--and then Jane Fleming appears on the scene--oh I think I shan't go back to Hollywood!!! No-but really my sweet--try to come out--even for a few days if that is all you can spare--How swell--how absolutely grand the thought of you here is---and we could drive back together--perhaps even through Yuma--I should want so to see that famous town first--with you my love--if you should feel up to it!--

Goodnight darling--I have been up in the clouds since starting this--someday I shall come back to earth and there will be a loud "boom"--

You have been so sweet to me--you have lifted me out of many depths--the thought of you is all that is necessary--and I promise not to write any more 'whining' and 'washey' letters--that last one of mine was a mistake--I should really feel pretty lucky--

I know I shall dream a very sweet dream tonight--

My love--

Ned

P.S. At the beginning Ellen said to send you her love and to urge you again to pay us a visit--she is so fond of you--she will write as soon as she finds a minute--


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